Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
My mom just came into the kitchen and watched me take a double shot of whiskey and chase it with a beer and said "you are my son." Proudest family moment ever
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
Randomize
