We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
Naked Twister starts at high noon
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
My boss asked me to pass over one of my business cards and instead I had condoms fall out of my wallet, how’s your day going??
hurry up. it's a friday night and i'm drinking in my office by myself. wearing a stewie griffin costume. the cleaning lady is judging me.
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