so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
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