it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
I just met a guy from Australia at the bar. I asked him what it was like down under and he told me if I went home with him he'd let me find out. I love Australians.
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
Randomize
