I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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