I can't watch pbs sober anymore
At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.�
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
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