We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
Randomize
