Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
Call me in 2 minutes and go along with what I say. You're hysterical and I must go comfort you asap. He just asked if I was ready to experience sex with a wizard and he wasnt kidding.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
You're breaking my sexual little heart
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
You do realize it’s only a matter of time before I have a bad day and come home with an alpaca?
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
Randomize
