Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
Randomize
