his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
Randomize
