Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
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