yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
Randomize
