who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
Randomize
