I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
Randomize
