smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
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