Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
Update: drank half a bottle of Bourbon and texted three ex's. Waiting for the roommates to go to sleep so I can raid the fridge.
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize
