my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
Randomize