discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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