so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
Next Halloween, remind me to find a different wingman. Walking out in your pirate costume talking like Captain Ahab while i was banging her and telling me I had to harpoon the white whale really pissed her off.
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
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