im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
Randomize
