sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
That's good. So do you know why there is a giant pile of old tires in the laundry room and kitchen?
Well we knew you needed some tires, found someone on the way home who was giving them away and took them all. Has to be 4 in there you can use.
Randomize
