There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
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