we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
at 4 in the morning i heated a family sized mac n cheese for a minute and decided to eat it frozen cuz I didn't wanna wait for that long
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
Randomize
