i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
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