I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
they need to just BURY HIM!
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
Mom said you looked used
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
Randomize
