new low.... made out with someone while peeing
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
Oh thank Jesus fuck for my shitty infertile womb. Crisis averted
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
Randomize
