Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
fuck. you.
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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