3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
he fucked my hip out of place.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
Mom just sent me an email. The subject line is "How to avoid a urinary tract infection"
LET IT GO MOM
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize
