Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
Randomize
