my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
Randomize
