Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Randomize
