I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
Randomize
