Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
Randomize
