Midget sex pt 2 tonight
Do you still have your period?
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
Randomize
