Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
When she introduced her friend to me I shook his hand and told him not to leave his ugly vest at my apartment in the morning. He took it off and bought me a shot.
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
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