yo i have your phone
... oh so you probably won't get this message
...i apologize for hitting you up so much tonight im just kinda in a little pickle. im going to sleep in my car near u so pretty plz lmk if you head home...
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
New low: eating a buttered roll while taking a shit.
This is why we're soulmates.
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
Randomize
