the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
Hey? Just a hypothetical. You ever accidentally kill somebody's cat on purpose? Like you didn't mean to but it had it coming? If you're wondering it tripped me while I was walking down the stairs and I landed on it as I fell.
Randomize
