Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
Three Decembers later, I'm looking at this fuckin Santa lingerie I bought and just realized my stocking never got stuffed....
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Randomize
