cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Randomize
