Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
