used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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