Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
Randomize
