I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
Randomize
