oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
I forgot to tell you. Your neighbor was walking his tiny dog and saw me crawl out of my jeep drunk vomiting and holding onto my bumper. He just said: morning! all friendly.
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
Randomize
