weddingsv make me drug and hornr
Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
You are an awful beat friend I am goin to die in a car accident and then my corpse is going to be used by criminals ala weekend at bernies to rob a bank then my corpse will go to jail Thanks john Thanks for nuthin
The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
You know that girl that climbed through my window and got in my bed with me and fucked me? It turns out she was real and has a real boyfriend who is real pissed
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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