he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize
