like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
why do cheetos always look like penises
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
