This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
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