I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
Turns out my drunken logic and wordsmithing isn't quite the same as the sober version. I'm pretty sure I made fun of the managers mom at one point
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
He did a backflip because drugs
Randomize