The funny thing about my wife cheating on me is that the guy probably has genital warts now. Sweet.
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
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